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Showing posts with label burglary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label burglary. Show all posts

Thursday, August 7, 2014

PSA: The Story of Yoboro

I know....I seemed to be doing better and POOF, off the radar I went again. I have no excuse really. Forgive me and receive me with open arms....ok, maybe one open arm, yet again.

Let me quickly tell you about Yoboro though.

Everyone was out of the house, save for Ma Petrillo and I. As a background, we moved into our current location about 10 years ago, when the area was still more "foresty" than habitable for humans. But over the years, expansion and gentrification have smiled upon our area and the "foresty" days are like folktales. In all those years, we had contended with snakes, scorpions, alligator/some other big lizard, amongst other animals whose habitats we had invaded, but never had we had to contend another human being.

On this unforgettable Sunday morning, I had forced myself to fall asleep around 1am in order to be able to make it in time for a 7am Church service without looking like something the cat dragged in. I woke up around 5:30am to pee and that was when I noticed that a (sliding) window in my room had been open about 5 inches. I rolled this around my mind for a while and when I couldnt rationalize it, I filed it under "perhaps I did this unconsciously". The plan was to head back to bed for another 30 minutes before giving up on the sleep completely. I had barely been back to bed for 5 minutes when I heard Ma Petrillo shouting my name. For a while, she had been sleeping in the living room. According to her, the living room is better aerated.

I was grumbling at the fact that she was waking me up by shouting several feet away from me until she uttered the words which heralded the fear I lived in for weeks after this Sunday; "We have been robbed".
F-I-A-M......sleep cleared from my eyes as I ran to where she was.

Our house had been broken into and raided while WE SLEPT THROUGH THE ORDEAL!!!!
LOL...I laugh about this now, but really...it wasnt even remotely funny. Thankfully, we were both fine. I'd like to regale you with the theatrics involved but the short of the story is that our fence was scaled, sliding nets were torn from outside, burgalry proof was pounded out from outside, and access was gained into the house by so doing.

Bottom line is this, since we are living in Nigeria, we cant be cautious enough! Lock your sliding windows for the night, unplug and stow away handy electronic appliances for the night (tablets, laptops, phones) and most importantly, cover the 4 or 8 or 10 or \infty corners of your house with the BLOOD of JESUS. Because day by day, these people get more and more sophisticated and let's not even discount the use of jazz or chemicals!  I mean, how possible is it that 2 grown adults slept through the pounding out of a burglary proof?!!

Obviously, a lot of things could have gone wrong but thankfully, other than a few items stolen and some psychological and mental confusion left in the wake of the ordeal, nothing else was in jeopardy.

Please dont even get me started on the Nigerian Police Force.

This country is just not it!
We generate or own power supply
our water
security
pay for our health services........ I dont know precisely what works.

Yet, we dey here, singing "e go better"

I guess as long as there is life, there has to be hope, abi nor be so?

Meanwhile, this post on Nitty's blog is making my leg shake unto this my desire to have twins matter. In all of my thinking of having twins...I had never even given thought to the potty trainning part. I can imagine how hard it will be with just one baby....not to mention 2! Chukwu biko!!!
Since we are still on that matter, biko, how do you breast feed twins. Do you tell the first one "hey, dont suck too much, you need to remain some for your twin"? or do they get the memo from heaven?
Infact, thinking about caring for two babies at a time just gave me a headache.

Wait a minute, people actually birth triplets, and quadruplets and quintuplets!!!!!

Please, I am out of here!

Mothers of multiples, I  want to hear from you!!

Oh, sorry, I forgot to say "Yoboro" is the name we coined for the "skillful" perpetrator of burglary and theft.

And my heart swells for SisiYemmie for being the poster child for LDRs (Long Distance Relationships). God bless your home, darling!