It's Intentional!!!

There are many reasons why I am updating.
1) To do "Ntoi" to the naysayers (who I secretly think deliberately took this stance in order to get this reaction). Hi Atilola and Nma
2) I actually want to
3) There is much to say
4) Why on earth should I need a reason to post on my very own blog? Why?!
5) I can!
6) The stars aligned (stars of time, content, resources (Hi NEPA and SmileCom)).


This year has been very very eventful. A lot of growth...inward and outward. There are certain books that I have read within the past year and half ( or so) which have changed, and are still changing my life.....almost dramatically.

Goals by Brian Tracy

The Secret by Rhonda Bryne

and most recently,

Story Story by Kola Olaosebikan (BTW, whoever knows her,tell her I am a fan!)

I have known for about 4 years or so now, that nothing about my life is coincidental. While I may not be too enthusiastic about admitting it (in certain instances), I know, that all things have been intentional. There is definitely a higher force directing the affairs of my life and helping me out when it is obvious that I have no idea what to do, or how, or when,or where. Before then, whenever events occurred, it was "life happening". Now I know slightly better and I am better off for it.

The summary of all these aforementioned books in a nutshell (as it appeared to me) is simply that "You are what you think ". Isn't it the Bible that says that "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he"? There has not been any other point in my life, when philosophy and theology have agreed, other than concerning this summary. My job is to desire...and think things. The feasibility or logistics is above my pay grade and should not be my concern. Incredibly amazing stuff!

I do strongly believe, that someone, somewhere, is supposed to see this post, be prompted to read 1 or 2 or all, and experience some kind of "a-ha" moment or something. If you happen to eventually read these book(s)and feel/get nothing,worry not, maybe it is not the appointed time for you. I can't tell you how many times I had come in contact or had a chance to read one or two of these books, prior to now, which I didn't take up or pursue. Now I know, that the time and order in which I read each of these books was the ordained time; not earlier, not later....just right! The texts would not have been as profound to me then, as they are to me now, and I am grateful for that....all of it!

 .
Ehnehn, PSA and UNUSUAL DEPTH OVER!


The other reason for this post which I failed to mention earlier is that Lola tagged me in this award. And we all know now, that I am a sweetheart (if you don't, then you need to read this post). I don't want to have to relinquish this sweetheart position so I decided to get right on doing the needful. More so, who doesn't like an award?! Certainly not me!

1. What is your biggest pet peeve?
I am largely accommodating. I have many pet peeves. Circumstances determine which of my pet peeves becomes the biggest at that point in time.

2. What does your last text message say? 
On which of my lines (I'm Nigerian, duh!)? Ok here goes:
"Wow, Get unimaginably low rates to US, Canada, India, China and UK (Fixed). Recharge with N500 &dial *170*25# to get 50% off"
Glo is bae! *mops lone, baeless tear*

3. Can you taste the difference between Pepsi and coke? Which do you prefer?
Nna men!! These days if I am taking soda, it is because I need the sugar rush. I haven't given thoughts to which I prefer,but I do believe that Coca Cola is more readily available, now that I think about it.

4. Make a confession about anything.
I have been told that I snore while sleeping. I don't believe them.

5. Name one item on your bucket list
*scratches head* Is it a sad/bad thing that I do not have a bucket list?

6. If you were another person would you make friends with yourself?
Ez like you didn't read my previous post here. You tell me, wouldn't you make friends with me? *Flips hair*

7. What is your secret weapon to lure the opposite sex, boyfriend, husband, potential?
Lmao!!! As per, Lioness!!! At the risk of sounding vain, I do not...have not have/had to lure the opposite sex. Lure them into what exactly anyway? A romantic relationship? Sex? You either like me or you don't! If I have to force you to like me, that places the burden of sustaining that "likeness" on me. We all know I am too lazy for alladat. Aint nobody gat time/energy for that!
I don't know, maybe lure is a strong word.
This was such a funny question to answer!

8. What do you want to know about the future?
I don't want to know about the future. I have confidence in Him who owns the future and I am now aware that I can think/verbalize them into existence. So, I really look forward to how my thoughts/desires will be exponentially delivered. *does birdman hand rub*

9. What would you change about your experience in secondary school
Maybe I would not have swapped schools when I did. But then again,everything is intentional. Upon changing schools, a new level of academic excellence (which I didn't even know existed) was unlocked.

10. Scary movies or happy endings?
It depends on the time of the day and the day of the week, biko.  I am an equal opportunity movie-watcher.

Lola, thank you very much for the award.

Ladies and Gentlemen, per usual, the award came with rules: Here are the rules

1. Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site;
2. Put the award logo on your blog;
3. Answer the ten questions sent to you;
4. Nominate five blogs;
5. Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer.

So, I hereby tag:
Nedoux
T-Notes
NikkiSho
CherryChatter
Chantel Martha
And for good measure, a 6th person, 9jaGreat


My questions:

1. What is your secret weapon to lure the opposite sex, boy/girlfriend, husband/wife, potential? (hahahahaha, for the heck of it)

2. What was/is a major deciding factor in your choice of career?

3. What was/is a major deciding factor in your decision to be with or not to be with your current significant other?

4. What does the colour "black" represent to you?

5. Toinlicious vs HoneyDame, who is saner (Aha, now you gotta read both blogs!!!)

6. Novels or Movies?

7. Your favorite season of the year is?

8. The 8th Wonder of the world should be ___________

9. How many of your current friends were made in elementary/primary school?

10. Do you believe in the power of thoughts?

Now humming Travis Greene's "Intentional"

SAYONARA, People!

2014 in Hindsight

2014 review

Can you tell that I didn't type that with a straight face? 2014 review in April 2015? Heck yeah!!! Who says I can't?
Can you also tell that I am trying to use "ògbójú" for you?

Sigh!

Truly, never say never! I didn't think I'd be that blogger who would abandon her blog for months...almost a year, innit?
I am ashamed of the posts I 'refused' to let past my head. Some were borne out of pure, unbridled laziness, some I can't even explain why the heck they never got written down, but I can tell you that it's not like my life has been without events.

Anyhoo, let's quickly see how well I did with my 2014, sebi I reported myself to you people in this post? Oya bring out your pens and papers to score me:

Punctuality: I made pointed efforts... Some were a hit and some were a miss. Again, still a work-in-progress. Oh, but I do remember this one time when it was Toinlicious who kept me waiting, for hours, like a bride/groom whose spouse developed cold feet on the wedding day. Well, the gentleman she brought along + the Chinese meal we had + the twin babies who wouldn't stop freaking Toin out by smiling at her all-meal-long, totally made up for it. Oh wait a min, she hasn't told you this story yet? My apologies. Wait a min, this happened in 2015 - consider this part an "advance 2015 review"

Health: see ehn! 2014 was a very lovely year health wise! I can't even remember if I caught anything other than my occasional bouts of flu. My fitness resolution didn't play out very well until around November. I wonder if this is a good time to say between then and now, I have gotten 22lbs lighter. I have the Cambridge diet plan to thank for helping me jump-start that movement. And then there is GBBlog giving me juicing life recently. I mean, I couldn't recognise myself when I felt too lazy to crunch on cucumbers & carrots, and chose to juice them instead with some other stuff.  And then there is Antabobo's weight loss Insta journey steady inspiring me! She recently started blogging here and I suspect she may touch on that part once in a while. I started taking walks because of her but I have since stopped that aspect when someone put the thought of me getting kidnapped in my head. Times are hard biko. Ain't nobady gat ransom money inna mi house.
My edges... See ehn, that one deserves a post of its own. Edges not so great but at least I retained hair length! Glory!
And then, my nailsssss!!! People of God, I made it! I think I can categorically say (without my oga at the top saying something else), that I bite my nails no longer! Ask Toin, I have caught her one too many times glaring lustfully at my lovely talons. Tehehehehehhehe. I can't even lie, my inner beauty got a promotion. A mean, I raise holy hands in church without hesitation now. God is real yo!
                         
Grow some balls: lol...I did. I had my moments. Cut off some relationships, put some in their rightful places. Made peace with the fact that I may not be to others what they are to me and others may not be to me, what I am to them.....and, it's OK, really!

L.I.V.E: I can't say that I didn't try and I can't say it didn't yield results. It may not have been as much as I wanted to but hey, I still have about a century ahead of me.

Let go and let God:  Jesus loves me, warts and all, this I know. He's still working on me.

P.S: I am suspicious of Toin. I dont know how she has managed to get mentioned so many times in this one post. More so, I dont like the way she's looking at me right now. Oh! I think it is because I am typing this post from her laptop. Help me tell her Thank You!

Not to sound cliche, but I did miss this place. I intend to be back for real this time, so help me God.
Now tell me what you guys have been up to!!! Which of you got married, kids, heartbroken, a cat, a dog etc?!!!

Stay-at-Home-Executive-Director

The Real Problems of joblesnessness Working from Home.

Whooppeeee!!! NYSC was over in February. Don’t even ask me about it. I wasn’t a model Youth Corp member and everything was just a blur. Bottom line is it’s over. Done and Dusted.

But

May or May Not be HD

Contrary to what I was told….I am not HOT CAKE. I am NOT POPULAR DEMAND. With my “good grades” and “good head”, I have NOT been SNATCHED UP by Deloitte or Addax or KPMG or BAT or Accenture or Phillips or GLO or the likes.

Worrapun?!!

Well well well, unlike some of the bloggers Atilola has been meeting, I’m just another girl from the rapidly-drowning-Nigerian-middle-class with no Uncle or “Unku” in high places. Someone hand me a handkerchief please *sniff sniff*. 

The different politics that play out in labour recruitment processes are best left unsaid. Anyway, that‘s not why I am here/blogging this post/posting this blog. Whatever!

While I am deciding on what next to do with my very bright life, I have been jobless working from home. Y’all know how an idle hand is the devil’s workshop and all. I have been taking on some small small projects like that. Let’s discuss some of the problems inherent in this set-up:

Explaining the difference to most family members:

“Ahnahn! HD! You did not make lunch? Nonsense!!! What have you now been doing at home since morning?! Ehnehn? Se you could not put the beans to boil while you were “working” ni? Mchewwwwwww”

OR

“Oh Gooodness! HD!!!! These clothes I spread on the drying line since 8am are still there by 2pm. Are they supposed to get dry like prawn crackers before you fetch them in? Hian!”

OR

“HD my dear, please I forgot the bag where I keep the registers, at home. Please bring them to me at work. I need them. Bring them fast o” …..as per…you don’t kukuma have work.

Biko nu, can’t we just pretend like I am not here?! Ghost mode please!

Everything calls your name – your government name!

From Telemundo (when PHCN lets) to your bed, to oh Lord! the refridgerator to….everything. Need I tell you how many times I have heard the fridge call me while I’m within earshots “HDchukwu/OluwaHD, come hither”….surprisingly, no matter how many times I open it, additional food items do not miraculously appear…so confusing. Oh well!!! *Shrug*

Explaining why you are dressing up/dressed up:

While this hasn’t yet happened to me (probably never will, since I am a placard-carrying nudist in my house), I can imagine that a jobless “work-at-home-girl” might have some difficulties explaining why she is dressing up to go to her workstation within the house. See, some of these things are psychological. One may want to replicate an office setting within the house for optimal concentration and productivity. One of the ways of replicating the office setting is by dressing up…….. Can you tell that I didn’t type this point with a straight face?

NEPA/PHCN/IBE-something

Different names, same problems.

Do I need to spell out that working from home requires some great dose of self-discipline?

Of course, there are perks to joblessness working from home too, but let’s leave that for another post

I discovered a blog…quite new. I love the way she writes.. like monologues. Thinking about her posts is even making me chuckle. Check her out: Keji of Mo'Rounkeji

Toin asked a question in her last post. While I fear for what I may read in the way of comments, I also wish to ask the same question: “What comes to your mind when you think of me? How do I come off on this blog? Tell me what you think about when you hear/see/read me.” Please, TOIN, SNM and COY are exempt from answering this question.

Sincerely, for me these days, the thought of being a paid housewife isnt as repugnant as it used to be.

*image gotten from google*

New Year, New HD? Let's See

Happy New Year people. I hope it has been amazing for you so far? While I am not a “resolutions” kind of person, I’d like to share some of the precepts I am aiming to live by in 2014.

Truly let go and let God: As I have said in one of my earlier posts, I have the tendency to want to cover ALL bases.  I am constantly making Plans B, C, D, E, F, G, H………..ZA, ZB…, I try to anticipate all possible scenarios in order to minimize my shock/disappointment in outcomes. It is crazy and nerve-wrecking. Just imagine making plans for 100 ways a situation can turn out…..at the end of the day, only one happens. What then happens to the remaining 99 possible scenarios fully thought out and developed? WASTE!!!! Or worst still, out of the 100 well-thought-out possibilities, none happens. WASTE!!!! The past 5-6 years of my life have had me rethinking this behavior of mine. Almost EVERY major plan I have made was brought to nought.  God came through and through and through again! I’d have made plans based on the little I could see….and out of nowhere, something that would cast away all those plans for the better would happen. I reminisced concerning this with my sisters sometime over Christmas and taking stock of that which I could remember, which were visible to me, was quite amazing. It was humbling! Hence, I am resolving to just kukuma hand over to the Omniscient. What’s the point of working myself up to the point of frustration, only for Him to wade in, pat my head and do it His way anyway? Abeg, I have learnt, I am learning….I am leaning back and letting Him direct me. It will save me a lot of time and heart ache. I am going to attempt applying this to ALL aspects of my life.

Punctuality: I realized with a lot of alarm that I may have a little problem with my timing. This is particularly so, when I have to physically be at places. It doesn’t really come to play with my deliverables. But, when it comes to getting to the office, meeting people etc, I find myself almost always struggling for time……It’s gotta go!

Health:  Apart from sometime last year when I got a double whammy of Typhoid and Malaria, I have been blessed with relatively wonderful health. I intend to make more conscious effort to keep it that way this year.
I don’t like the Iya Ijebu that I am becoming. Hence, I am also all out for “Operation Get My Edges Back” (OGMEB).
For the longest time, I had resigned that I just could not have full edges. However, during my stay in China, which saw me constantly feeding my hair with coconut oil and shea butter, this notion died a natural death! I left China with significantly (relative to what used to be ) lush edges and hair generally. Now, I don’t know why they seem to want to recede into my neck, but whatever the reason, I am planning on FIGHTING it!
 In the same vein, do you remember what I said about biting my nails? I have resolved that I have bitten my nails enough to last me a lifetime. It is about time I became a proper lady and constantly gnawing on my nails definitely isn’t a step in the right direction. Lastly for health, all these lovely outfits I have in size 12 will not wear themselves. I need to walk, literally, into the direction of size 12. Gym ahoy! Healthy eating ahoy!

Get some attitude: Last year, I got better at taking less crap from people. I hate confrontations and as a result, I find myself being pushed over a lot of times as I’d rather suffer in silence than engage in a seeming confrontational conversation. I am increasingly realizing that I cannot always run away from confrontation.  So there, *shrug*

L.I.V.E:  This is self explanatory.

These are the major ones that came to mind so blatantly. I may or may not share more as time goes on.

Truly, I am excited about the year because I know it will lead me to lots of self discoveries.

By the way, @ilola, you are one amazing woman. Courtesy you, I met 2 amazing bloggers and courtesy you, I am more determined to shed the cloak of sloth on this blog and exercise some more discipline in typing and posting. Thank you!

What have you guys been up to? I am launching a “Finding Caro” campaign for Single Nigerian Man. I will tell you all about it soon enough.

While We are Waiting

So you see, while I am still waiting on my muse, I have decided to regale you and bring you up-to-date on the events in my life in the past few months. This shouldn’t take long, I mean, it has been that uneventful.

Take 1: NYSC

I decided that I might as well make myself useful while I am around here. I am quite restless by nature so NYSC was a laudable idea for me, I mean, why postpone the evil day? I had been checking up on their website since around April, just so I could remain informed and be sure to take every important document away with me from NY. On getting here, I even went to the Ibadan and Lagos Secretariats to verify the validity of my documents. My diploma hadn’t been mailed to me as at the time I left NY, but I had my “Letter of Attestation” and this was supposed to suffice, according to the NYSC website. Armed with all these documents and a large dose of confidence (having had the said documents checked out by the 2 secretariats), I went off to Abuja. 8am on that great Tuesday, I was by the NYSC Maitama office, only to be told that I’d have to wait till 10am.

No wahala….I waited, signed in…queued……only for me to be turned back for not having my BA Cert/Diploma. I reiterated to them that the website made provision for the use of a “Letter of Attestation” in lieu of the Diploma. I was then told that the requirements had been changed, less than a week to my coming to Abuja. I was 10 feelings shy of depression. I was angry, upset……mad….every name in the book. Who changes requirements in the MIDDLE of registration?!!! I kept wondering why they could not have waited for the current registration to end before altering the requirements. So inadvertently, they made me waste my time and money heading to that place, even after I had tried to tighten all loose ends on my part. Perhaps catching a glimpse of that fine fine fine ex-governor. Donald Duke, at the airport, was supposed to make it worth my while……..SNORT

Take 2: Grandma’s Burial

About a week after I came home in July, my paternal Grandma died. Frankly,  I was emotionless. She was 84 years old, give or take, so all I thought of was “Oku Amala”. As far as I was concerned, there was no reason for tears and as a result, I made plenty fun of my dad when I heard that he cried. 

Fast forward to the burial day: It all started with my bro (who was driving) and I finding ourselves behind the hearse. Those stupid pall bearers and their stupid heart-tugging songs (sniff). Hearing all those farewell songs had my tear ducts prepping themselves, but I still sat there tryna feel gangsta with myself. They set her up outside the church for a short Lying-in-State. They opened her up and that was it! She was by no definition a fair-skinned person in her life, but deng! The person I saw in that coffin was BLACK! and FRAIL and VULNERABLE-LOOKING and very much “UNLIFE-LIKE”. While the type of embalmment used might have contributed especially to the “unlife-like look”, I couldn’t help tying it back to nature. He did say from dust we come and to dust we shall return. The picture I got that day was so literal and lent credence to that assertion. Grandma really looked like clay…… she really did (sniff).

From that experience, I can readily advice anyone who is trying to find an essence to this life to attend a funeral and attempt to see the corpse. It makes it much much much clearer….. This world is vanity and you will only be remembered by your deeds, both good and bad. No matter how much Mary Kay, MAC, Iman, Shiseido etc you invest in, in the end, it won’t even matter……at all. Ish!!!

The entertainment part was nice though. I was particularly excited for the “Oju Agbo” (specified dance). I personally handled Ma Petrillo’s plastic bag (for sprayed money :D). I was definitely on the winning team…:D

On another note, the hustle for party souvenirs is real yo!!! Whhatttt?!!! I lost count of how many times I said “Whoooosaaa” that day. People just kept stretching my patience. I don’t understand the need to have EVERY item of souvenir given. Not to mention those who had like 5 of each.

I have placed an embargo on my household after that experience. Maternal Grandma has to wait at least 5 years from now before she kicks the bucket. Siblings also have to wait for at least 4 years before they talk marriage, unless they have incorporated the money for the event planner. Yes, Ngor (Not Lady Ngo), my dear sister, it includes you! I am still dealing with my room smelling of burnt firewood.

*Phew*

I am in search of a marketable certificate course to embark on. It seems everyone and their dogs are going into Project Management around here. Kindly suggest other business related courses that you are aware of.

I miss regular blogging and regular blog-hopping…..this internet sucks major!

Shout out to my new followers. Can’t believe I gained followers even during my unannounced hiatus. Welcome here, you rock!

Oh, It was my birthday on the 4th, Ma Petrillo's on the 16th and the blogiversary on the 11th (iThink? See? I am losing it!). October sure is a special month.

* all images gotten from google