Welcome.Ekaabo.Kedu.Merhaba.Akwaaba.Lafia. Bienvenue

>>>quick announcement->Fasten your seat belt..'cos you might be in for a crazy ryde...:)

Monday, October 31, 2011

Wedding Nuggets

Everything around me seems a bit uptight, even the weather is so uptight with that stupid pollution that is the everyday weather here in China. So, to lighten things up a likkle bit, here is to the brides-in-the-making, Doll and  Pretty Lashes (I am sure there are more, but their names elude me at this time...do well to help jump-start my memory if you remember).
 I have this thing for weddings and ish. It might have stemmed from the fact that I had quite a deprived childhood, event-wise. Anyway, there is this photography page I "like" on FB. Oh, all those wedding pictures!!!! *drool* worthy!
Here is a note they shared at some point....



Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes. (Jesos!!! oh ye married ones, biko, is this true? Make I kukuma renew subscription with Single with Boyfriend club! May we not encounter evil! 45mins is evil!!!)
 Quick Update: Given that this has been very ambiguous, I am taking the liberty to interpret this as follows because:  (1) I can   (2) My mind is constantly in the gutter   (3) Did I mention I can?
Ok, so I strongly believe that the it means that boyfriend spends 45mins more than husband pre, peri and post coital.


Q: What is it when a man talks nasty to a woman?
A: Sexual harassment.

Q: What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man?
A: $3.99 a minute.

Q: How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they just sit there in the dark and complain. (and even try to take advantage of the period sef! mchewww)

Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
A: Through his chest with a sharp knife. (I am sorry, you can't make reference to this blog in the actulaization of this. You read my pseudo-disclaimer, aye?)

Q: Why are men and parking spaces alike?
A: Because all the good ones are gone and the only ones left are disabled.

Q: Why do men want to marry virgins?
A: They can't stand criticism.

Q: Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
A: Because those men already have boyfriends.

Q: What is a man's view of safe sex?
A: A padded headboard.

Q: Do you know why women fake orgasm?
A: Because men fake foreplay.

Q: What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
A: After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

Q. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?
A. He died laughing before he could tell anybody.  (Idiot, what was so funny? May angel Gabriel give him a dirty slap at the golden gate!)



Speaking of brides-in-the-making, I had a conversation with my mum yesterday and it bordered on hysterical. She had attended a wedding in Nigeria so I asked how it went. She did the usual, and ended with the usual prayers, Eyin naa a se iru e o (You will also do likewise wrt the wedding). So, boosted with my A1 in Yoruba language confidence, I decided to say a prayer and said "Eyin iyawo a m'eni o" (The bride's back will recognize the floor (literal meaning). Mama Mia just burst into laughter. After her explanation, I realised that I had just cursed this poor couple who don't even know who the heck I am! I was supposed to have negated my statement, ie "Eyin iyawo oni m'eni o". The translation of this is that everything is supposed to happen so fast (pregnancy) that the bride won't even realize they had been using the mat to do the deed.

Similarly, when Ngor (again, not the famous LadyNgo) was much younger, she had heard my folks greet people during the festive period saying "Odun a y'abo o". "Abo" in yoruba means female. So she thought it was gender sensitive and when the next male came calling she attempted to greet like an elderly person and said "Odun a y'ako o". By saying that, she had just cursed the coming year, saying it wasn't going to augur well!!!!


Oh the Horror!!!
 
Happy new month in advance. May your expectations not be cut short.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Beijing in Pictures 2

As always, you guys have been amazing with your posts, comments and ish...For that reason, especially my October people, accept this token of love from me to you!

Well, if you missed the first sequel, here you are..

NuffSaid!


This I found in a pizza place typically full of college students. If verbal won't do the trick, written will...For better results, speak their language.
 In other words, don't bother bringing your whole house when you are coming. We also have supplies!

Very common sight, especially around the food/restaurant areas. It always looks like a carnival/festival around those places.
 A view from somewhere in Sanlitun, Beijing.
 I believe I have emphasized how much I love good food on this space, right? This one was delish...Please don't ask me for the names. The only thing I can tell you about this one is that it had pineapples in it and I think beef...Wo, I don't know jare. All I know is it went down and thankfully stayed down!

Definitely not an indigenous Beijing food....just pasta and tuna. My friend said it tasted nice...*shrug*


They are the devil! They taste soo good but are probably typhoid waiting to happen! Oh and you may call them Chinese Suya if you like...


Another none indigenous food. They simply called it rice and stewed beef. No need for complications, kwa?
And this one is for the wee one Chineke/Abasi/Osanobwa/Awimayehun/BigDaddy blessed one of us with (Naija Bloggers). Wa d'iru, wa d'ogbon. Welcome

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Finally Stylish and Versatile

I am very overgasted and flabberwhelmed with the comments on my last post. Thanks for the congratulatory messages....You are the best...and did I spy Emeka Amakeze there?! Ha, better days are here!

Now to the crux of the post, I think I have done this before, but I am definitely not aversed to sharing more.
Big thanks to Priscy, Deolascope, Toinlicious, Barby1923, CherryChatter, DestinyYNC and Missy Tee for awarding me.
I am amazed by how much I have managed to put off doing this which leads me to the first thing about me I wish to share:

1)     I can sooo procrastinate. It is a major vice of mine. I have been trying all my damned best to reduce the intensity. So far, maybe little progress has been made. But the confusing part of it is that once I decide to be up and doing, I am like a bulldozer, I just go and you better not get in my way! This leads me to my second peek-a-boo.

2)     I am a bunch of contradcitions. This manages to make itself evident in everything I do. YY thinks I am a pessimistic realist, some others think I an optimistic realist. At least, there is a concensus in that I am realist. I always have the urge to attempt exploring possible turnouts of an action and sort of develop a plan B, just in case. It doesnt always work , but for the most part, it has worked for me because I end up getting unsuprised by the end results of certain actions. I think it is all Mama Mia's "fault". You see, she pretty much was the only who brought us up and she is a bbbbbiiiigggg realist. So I dont know how differently I could have turned out since I grew up hearing stuff like "I will come and pick you guys up from school, but just in case, here is some money for transport fare if I am not able to make it down here." She is very big on diversification of everything. I dont think there is anything about her that goes straight without some "iyana" (branches). I always have a problem filling out assessment forms, eg, my housing form for China. I was asked to describe myself and I said "I can be extroverted, yet introverted, organized yet disorganized.....etc." because this is indeed true. And I hate a situation where I would not be able to defend something that I have said, so it is better I give you all the possible scenarios. I can't explain it but it all makes sense to me.

3)      I dont know how to keep still when I hear "good" music. Every (work) morning and evening is guaranteed entertainment for my easily amused chinese co-commuters on the bus. Since I don't understand any announcements, I just plug in my earphones and I off to Naija land. By not keeping still, I dont mean that I Kaffylise or Jacksonise myself on the bus o, but the not so subtle head-bobbing and neck sliding coupled with subtle hips swaying count as dancing, aye?

4)      As far as music goes, I am very biased to Naija music and then Carribean music. I know some of you are thinking "before nko?" You will be amazed at the number of Nigerians who pick western songs over Nigerian music, not that anything is wrong. I think this is partly because as far as Western music goes, I have a hard time even deciphering what they are saying. All that nasal tinzz....abeg abeg! So when I hit a Nigerian club or Nigerian event, please please and please, stick to the theme because refusal to do so makes me want to slap the DJ upside down!

5)      In line with that, some years ago, I was sure that I had been switched/imported at birth. I had this maddd love for Jamaican culture/people., not that I knew jack about them. I just loved them and I was sure that I was Jamaican at birth. I even went as far as friending several of them on hi5. Speaking of which, does that site still exist?
         However, moving to the States has changed that. I still like them but not enough to wish I was one at birth though I can still like to have the winding blood infusion. Those girls are by default low-weisted-body-twisting people...maka y!

6)       These days, I am pretty sure that I am a South South babe....forget that I am full bloodied Yoruba...Something must have happened at birth. Ok, there is a logical explanation. I was born of South South blood, but conceived in Jamaica and delivered by a Jamaican midwife........in my first life. I can't explain it (I can't seem to be able explain anything). Something about those people just feels like home to me. I am almost sure that if I will marry a Nigerian, it will be South Souther! Even Mama Mia has resigned to fate.

7)       Still on South South tinzz, I am a polygynist. I am mentally married to Timaya, but soon to demote him to 3rd husband is Duncan Mighty. My gawd! Great things are happening in that part of the world! Kilode? 9ice and Asa still have keys to my heart anytime but I just discovered Duncan Mighty (apparently my head has been buried in sand for a long while). I feel something special between us so if you know him, please tell him that he is under mental-marriage-lockdown...#teamWeneMighty# PET Projects, I picture you shaking your head at my choice of music....hehehehehehehe. In my 3rd husband words, I don't give a shot if your ikebe dey shoot catapult! You dont know what I mean? Ok check this, 
 

8)        I am not really an adventurous person but I could be quite daring. I am very comfortable within my comfort zone but once in a while, I get out. It has been interesting but I know for a fact that I have to be hit with a stick on the head, threatened with a life without "good music" and stuffed in a bagco bag before I try to go and live in another country alone without understanding the language. an example of the daring me was me going bald (African Queen style) several years ago. I had some Brenda Fassie ish going on at that time and might I say I rocked it too. I refused to go to this middle-of-nowhere-mountain-adventure with some friends here a few weeks ago. They speak a reasonable amount of Chinese but the trip wasnt organized by the program, they organized it by themselves with none of them having been there before. They were going to climb this mountain and see the sunrise and set.....You say wetin? abeg abeg, that kain thing is not my cup of tea. But below, you will find an example of my cup of tea...as if I don't attract enough attention, I decided to go golden/auburn (I don't even know the name).
So henceforth, for a brief while, you may call me the Black Ginger.

Oh, I sent a picture of the new hairstyle to my pet brov (from here) and you know what he said?
"Is there a carnival?"...you see why that boy can never be promoted from being a pet?

So I am going to feign ignorance at having a list of 8 instead of 7 and just pay this forward to the following super-fantastic blogs. I understand that some of you may not be able to partake in it due to the nature of your blogs but I just wanted to let you know that I just discovered your blogs and find them stylish and versatile.

Sasimalia - Super talented Sasimalia organized everything about her wedding..yes you read right...from the decoration to the cooking! I am still in awe.

Martha - Unlike me, she is definitely not hiding. She is out there and full of news.

Sasimalia - This is her other blog. The sizzling part of her url should give you hint. If it hasnt, let your tastebuds and nose lead you there.

Tunrayo - I am still in the proces of acquaiting myself with this musican-in-the-making missy.

Yolii - A lady with an exotic heritage...and she loves to do her nails herself! Fashionable and sassy, she seems to be.

Buzzer - She gives you a brief look into her life. I get the sense that it is more a journal of her corporate life but it is too early for me to say. By the way, she (as well as I) needs some business ideas. So head over and let's rub minds..(as if you people will tell us business ideas!).

Che - Let Che take you through her experience as a female banker. You know how stressful bank work is in Nigeria so head over to hers and show some blog-love.

Shereen - Let's just say I am getting the vibes of fuuuun times on this blog. It is exactly as the url says, the blog has a heartwideopen...#nuffsaid#

Okeoghene - I am yet to fully catch up on this woman but I have an inkling as to what to expect....the unexpected! I mean, what else can I say about a woman who eloped with her husband to get married and while she and hubby celebrate anniversary in April, people congratulate them about 8months after..You dont understand? Head over to hers!

Amaka - Oh Amaka, she has this really wide imagination and asks some thought provoking questions..sometimes they are hilarious too e.g what do you do when you erroneously slap your boss' butt while trying to slap off an ant? Me I dont know about you o but something about it is "thought provoking".

Oyindamola - This blog is deep..no other way to describe it. I found the posts on UNILAG very nostalgic. You should check them out.

Michael Onobote - I love to read from Nigerian male bloggers. It is highly refreshing that the blog is also not about stereotypical male stuff like libido and getting girls (rolls eyes). I sense lots of substance and standard in the way he writes.

Inyamu - Apart from the fact that I think she is drop-dead-gorge, I love the way she writes too. Oh, the sarcastic humor vibes I get from some of her posts have me holding my sides too.

TravelBuff - Need some pointers on your proposed trip? Or needing inspiration for a vacay/holiday? This seems to be a correct one-stop.

Miss Enigma - She is apparently a veteran blogger and I am still wondering how I had managed to miss her on my radar for so long....fun stuff happening on that blog.


The Rule: Link the person/people who awarded you
                  Write 7 things/facts about you
                  Award 15 new blogs you discovered and find a way to inform them


I open to discovering more blogs so if I am yet to get to yours, please leave a comment.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

__ Don Waka, We Still Dey Carry Go

     So, as you might have surmised, October is a big month for me. My birthday was on the 4th as well as Mama Mia’s on the 16th (yup! 9jaGreat, we Librans are jest too special!….:D) and a year ago from today, this blog was birthed. You know, I thought I was going to have something really bright and ingenious to write/do to commemorate this 1st year anniversary ……turns out that I don’t. In the stead of that, permit me to regale you with the run-down of how and why I started blogging.

     If you live in a little college village upstate New York and you are as fickle as HoneyDame, chances are that you will get bored very easily.  I love to read. I pride myself on at least giving everything I stumble on equal chances to be read (although somewhere along the line, I drop some for not being interesting/engaging enough). My friend had started blogging a few months before me, maybe even more than a few months. And she had sent me the link to her blog to check it out. I did, and from time to time, went there to see what was new. I had no idea that I could just click on some of those links to read other blogs.

     At that time, blogging seemed to me as the new facebook, as everyone and their dogs had blogs.  I almost even swore that I wouldn’t join the band wagon. I spent a few hours on Bella Naija from time to time but wasn’t satisfied because the update time on interesting stuff was too far between for me. Naijapals was just…..”urrrgghh” for me. Those forums were bland, and for the most part, full of obnoxious and totally clueless people (by my estimation). It just wasn’t my type of thing.

    I had always wanted to keep a diary of some sort, or more appropriately, a journal. But the one time I attempted doing that, the writing space wasn’t enough and I had to code the entries so bad for the fear of it being discovered. It wasn’t like I had classified information in there, but I just wasn’t comfortable with the idea.  I later tried to re-introduce it into my facebook page but soon realized that I couldn’t just update my status everytime an idea/topic for discussion ran through my head. Plus, if you haven’t already noticed, I am quite a lady of many words (especially when I am being social). So again facebok couldn’t cut it for me neither would twitter (not that I even attempted that one).

   I can’t remember how, but I stumbled on Baba Alaye’s blog. I had just read his latest post at that time and decided that he was captivating enough to make me want to read his posts from the beginning. I did. And from there, I moved to T-Minx’s blog. Apparently, the two had some blog love going on. Either that was real or just a joke, I still don’t know because now, I have realized that on Blogger, the possibilities are endless.
By the time I was done perusing the blogs, I had found the answer to my “troubles”. I could just have a blog! I could write about those things I found interesting around me. I don’t take myself too seriously so for the most part, it was for the entertainment value. That way, I could amuse myself sometimes. Also, I don’t know about anyone else, but I get kicks from reading something I had written at a prior time. I am intrigued by reading generally because I can create the scene in my mind and make conjectures about the thought process of the author at that time…etc. So, without much ado, I took maybe 2seconds to decide on a name and signed up for a blog.

    On why I decided to be anonymous, I don’t really know why. Perhaps it is just in my nature to attempt doing something from the background first and then take it up a notch if after a while I feel convinced it is the best thing to do. There really isn’t much logical explanation to that.

    Remember I said starting the blog was majorly for my entertainment. I mean, I had no idea that people read other people’s blogs like that. So I carried on with that notion and you can imagine my surprise when about 2months after I out up my first post I saw that I had a comment! I mean, I was still (and still am) learning the ropes at that time! P.E.T Projects, I could I ever forget that?! How did you even discover me? I was ecstatic! The ecstasy escalated when I got my first Myne Whitman comment. It was/still is such a big deal to me. I had heard her name somehow somewhere before then. I had seen her blog and made a conclusion that she was in the very least a blog celebrity. So in my mind, I would have to be bordering on grey-haired before I would ever be recognized by her person on blogsville.

   And before long, I started getting those “regulars” of that time; you know the ones who would still drop a line or two on your crappiest post ever just to encourage you. The feeling was indescribable. Shout out to Ble Ble and @ilola. And to think, a year down the road, they still haven’t deserted me.

    Uhm, my original purpose for starting a blog has been fulfilled so far. There is never a dull moment with blogsville.  I totally love my life here. I am grateful for your giving this blog a chance, for the occasional educative and all time entertainment pieces on your blogs, your comments here (I can’t over emphasize)…..just everything.  You may not know it but perhaps if I got no encouragement, I might have dabbled into some life threatening activity to pass time, perhaps I  would have been auditioning for the next Big Loser from eating so much junk to pass time…..In some ways, you saved me.

And to my followers: You guys are the next best thing since shortbread. You are amazing. About 2-3 posts ago, I mentioned how I would love to have 100 followers to commemorate today. Maybe or not they were humoring me but between then and now, I see that about 11 people obliged me. You rock!!!

To those Silent Readers Who Don’t Leave Comments But Still Read Anyway:  You are awesome. And even though I’d rather you drop a line to let me know that you were here, I still appreciate your virtual presence.  

40 something posts, 700 and something comments, 97 followers , a few awards and an incredible and ever growing community after,

Here

To an even greater year ahead.

So this is me saying “Hopefully, next year (if you don’t all desert me) I will have something more profound and concise (and maybe shorter too) to say. *Pause* Again, thank You.”

****wipe tears-filled eyes****

The Parry continues at 9jaFOODie's and LohiO's for some lemzing.



***Disclaimer: Image gotten from google.com***

Friday, October 7, 2011

Beijing in Pictures 1

NOTE: Please bear with me. I do not know why some of the pictures are not placed right. Just crane your necks this once. I promise to do better with the next picture post. Oh, by the way, you berra not try to steal any picture from here without reference or permission. They are all MINE, got it?! Enjoy






 Aha, you remember what I said about the bicycles here. This above is an idea of what I meant. You see how the bicycles go on forever? This represents just 0.0000000001% of the general idea.

 Pay close attention to what the Umbrella says and correspond it to the items of sale...Chinese have a "wonderful" sense of humor.


 The sights from the pedestrian bridges can be beautiful. And interestingly, they use the pedestrian brigdes very much. Another similarity with Naija, there is nothing you can't buy on those bridges; from pomade to decorations, to fruits....uhm....Wait, did I just use the word "pomade"?



 Ah! Ok, short story...picture this, 7:00pm,  HoneyDame with roommate, hungry as an American mosquito, decide to go in search of a restaurant. Bear these in mind: HoneyDame speaks no Chinese, except Ni Hao and Xiexie count, and she uses chopsticks just as good as Dame Patience (gives courtesy) speaks English. Anyway, we found this place and placed our orders. That went well until they brought that menace you see in the picture, Apparently, it was a "Hot Pot" spot. What happens here is they give you that sucker up there with fire lit underneath it and bring your order raw. So basically, you cook it by yourself. That wasnt the problem though, after all, I can cook. Here is the problem, we had ordered for noodles.......and the only utensils we were equipped with were chopsticks. So, how well do you think somebody we both know fared, trying to get the noodles out of the hot pot?! Guess who went to bed hungry, angry and light-pocketed? *BigSigh*....NEVER AGAIN!                                                                               



 The front entrance of the Summer Palace. The day we visited here, I was the most ill-prepared (as always) tourist.

1) I hadnt even read anything about the place
2) I didnt check the weather. It was rainy. I had no umbrella and I was wearing slippers. You will see why the slippers was a bad idea in the next pictures post.

 Colorful, no?
 Another street view from the pedestrian bridge.

These choreographers were practicing just as I was about to leave. Something about the ambiance of both the music and their moves had me chuckling the whole time. Don't ask me why, because I cant place my finger on it either.


I just want to use this one line (or maybe two) to express my gratitude to my followers, both old and new. And more especially those who leave comments. You may not know how, but you really make my day.  I always look forward to the comments you write. Thanks my pipu! Don't forget to use the follow button if you haven't already done so...;)

Thank you all, who awarded me with several blog awards. I indeed promise to get to them as soon as I am done putting up the posts I had planned for a little while. I do appreciate your gifts.

Quick Update: My new blog look, to go, to stay or to tweak? Please leave your takes as comments with as much details as possible..eg" keep the background but not the design of the text in the post". You get? Loff u muchos